it's been just about a week since the conference and I'm still digesting everything I injested over the course of that weekend. what a trip that was! to be amongst so many amazing women!
after the first full day, I found myself almost in a daze of sorts, mulling over the language I hadn't used in over a year and remembering how to use it and how to how to hear it. I felt almost taken aback and ashamed that I was not so into the whole activist scene... cuz I had decided to go off to see the world instead... then of course, I snapped right out of feeling bad about that one! haha I was able to use my experiences abroad - namely those from Cambodia - to explain certain issues, to demonstrate how we can talk talk talk about what needs to be done here and what needs to be done there... but until you're actually at the and in the "there" of which you speak... you realize that talk is cheap. ask the locals what they want. communicate with those whom you want to help. we live in a global community, but that doesn't entail nor does it give anyone the right to go somewhere and decide what's got to be done. back to basics. and so that knowledge proved to be invaluable considering many of the women present at the conference hadn't done a whole lot of travelling and had been engrossed with studies more than with experiential knowledge of the world which they purport to have all the answers for. and I think they were really able to identify with me since I hadn't had that knowledge either before I left... it was a really awesome moment for so many reasons.
the conference organized a variety of paper panels, audio-visual student projects, as well as workshops...
there was a sort of presentation more than a work-shop type thing that was really interesting: women hurting women - violence within lesbian relationships. you know, I hadn't even thought about an issue such as that one... that it even was an issue at all. I wish I had my notes here and then I would be able to list off some pretty unknown facts, but alas, I left them at home. but one that really struck me and so stuck into memory was this: a distinct difference between violence in heterosexual and lesbian relationships is that switching between abuser and victim from relationship to relationship occurs for the only latter type. this switching of roles occurs out of guilt or vengeance, depending on whether one was the abuser or victim in one's last relationship. this just doesn't typically happen within heterosexual relationships since the man is usually the abuser and the woman usually the victim, or, survivor as they prefer to say... ***this term isn't used concerning lesbians... she certainly does not feel like anything close to a "survivor" since the medical practitioners and councilors do not recognise that abuse among lesbians exists... women are not supposed to be violent, therefor how could she have truly been abused? not to mention many within the medical field aren't as familiar with or keen to the knowledge of lesbianism and homosexuality and so she is reluctant to admit that she is part of this still-deviant "lifestyle"*** well... I could go on and on here... but I won't. it was just SO friggen interesting and eye-opening. if you wanna know more about this or anything else wrt the conference, just tell me in your comments and I'll send along everything that I can.
the language began to flood in and before I knew it, I was emersed. I forgot how passionate I am for not just women's issues, but PEOPLE's issues. stuff that inevitably concerns each and every one of us. I learned so much and I renewed my desire to work in this area of raising awareness, activism, sharing and emparting of knowledge to create tangible change. there was a speaker from FAFIA (canadian feminist alliance for international action... click the hyperlink!) - government! - and I got this feeling inside that that would be the direction I'd take upon my return from my next travelling stint. to infinity and beyond! haha only time will tell... and I look forward to discovering what the future me ends up doing!
one more thing though, the workshop in particular that I especially loved was of spoken word poetry. learned a few tricks of the trade and I've started applying what I've learned in my own pieces... started writing something too... perhaps I'll include it on a blog near YOU! I love the creativity this conference has induced in me! all this reference to water, flowing, emersion, flooding... kinda have to go pee! :-)
yipee!
so I'm on my way to Kaslo, BC... home of the fabulouso May Days! I can't wait! happy reading! hopeful thinking! sorry I'm ending this so abruptly... but like I said, I have to pee!!!!
xxx
ps. Mike Jacobson sais: hey! what are you still doing on the computer? you crazy cat! what? you're writing a blog? can you mention my name in it? cool. thanks! meow!
Mike Jacobson
Mike Jacobson
Mike Jacobson
9 comments:
Wishing you a pleasant weekend in Kaslo , B.C.
Refreshing mountain air and forest greens not to mention emerald green waters fed by milky streams.
2bornot2b
I think you've inpsired me to start writing again....not sure why, but thank you.
It's so awesome that you had the experience of like-minded theories and mind, collectively agreeing that change is needed....and then acting on it. ur...of some sorts.
I think you'll always have the language and you'll always be surrounded by beautiful women who strive to be humans beings...who strive.
Love you,
Car
Rabbit, FAIFA has struck a cord.. Hmmmm, will look into it some more and more.And then some. I have been pondering about doing an internship in Bangalore when i am there, which emans I stay all summer and then some. FAIFA and Queer of color are two interesting paths so far in my India plans. It is the approach I am interested in..ideasaflowing..
Val briefed me about the conference. Would have given anything to be there. Missing Edm a lot.
We are gonna volunteer at the Blues fest and will watch Ani. hurraayyyyyyy
Hope you are doing well. More soon.
Hugs and kisses
S
beautiful!!!! sahana that sounds like a wonderful plan for you! I'd love to hear more about it... I have a phone number you know! heehee I'll email you the number in case you forgot... ;-) anyhow, that's how I felt after the woman from FAIFA presented... I'm gonna look more into it after my return, but definitly up until the time I leave it's something on my mind... I loved ottawa so much when I was there visiting you and so to move there is definitly an option I'm seriously considering. it's where everything happens in canada! I feel a pull there... but just watch, I'll end up going after you've left for India! timing... so awesome eh? wow. I wish you could have been there!!! awe... I miss you...
glad for the inspiration I've caused! if you can reach just ONE person, right? heehee well well well.
love yous!!!
xxx
from the experience I have gained over the years I have come to see and hence believe that the abuse is not totally stemming from man to woman. Not as mentionned in the present blog.
I have hard facts that abuse is directed towards the man in many ,, not all,, cases. The survivor in cases such as this is the man.
We all know and have studied that in the past and presently in some countries the abuse is definitely from the man to the woman. However , in this country and others , the laws are in fact biased against the man, no matter what.
What I am reading is concentrated and if the reference to 'people' in this blog is refering to 'man' why not say 'man'. Include this battered 'man' and he will include you ps,. which he already does.
Please stop your self indulgence and keep an open mind. If you are to dare take a look ,,,, take a good look.
I must add , in the event that you feel you have the answers and knowledge which offer indisputable theories , dont bother looking.
Keepano Penmind
To the comment above...I find it hard to believe that in all your read you pulled out that one sentence. It appears that the Ornery Hipster is making reference to HUMANITY more so than feminism. If you have been reading any of these blogs, you would have seen and understood that it's all about LIFE and ALL the PEOPLE who collectively call themselves human beings. To add... equality comes when Feminism doesn't have a need to exist. Until then, we need to stop picking out the things we only want to hear and start opening our own minds to the reasons of others.
But hey...that's just my opinion...
"from the experience I have gained over the years I have come to see and hence believe that the abuse is not totally stemming from man to woman. Not as mentionned in the present blog."
I never said it didn't... as much as I never said it did. that is besides the point of the paragraph on abuse within LESBIAN RELATIONSHIPS where I drew from the VAST MAJORITY of abuse cases where over 90% of women in their lifetime will be abused by a man at some point.
"I have hard facts that abuse is directed towards the man in many ,, not all,, cases. The survivor in cases such as this is the man."
there will always be exceptions and there is of course the roles which we are all socialized into that teach us certain things about the differences between men and women... women are socialized to believe we are weaker, helpless, dependent... men socialized to believe they are stronger, confident, independent. the tension arises when we don't fit into these roles so nicely. men aren't supposed to get abused by women, but you're right, it does happen... it's just way under-reported just as much as it is a different kind of abuse - not as physically apparent as the kind of damage most often inflicted on women.
"We all know and have studied that in the past and presently in some countries the abuse is definitely from the man to the woman. However , in this country and others , the laws are in fact biased against the man, no matter what."
I would have to 100% disagree with the latter part of this comment. I am curious as to what you are basing your opinion on since this simply isn't factual at all. the laws in this country and of the US are set up to revictimize an individual time and time again. in the case of rape and other sexual abuses, this is especially traumatizing to the woman (because these kinds of abuses are predominantly committed against women by men, usually a family member or someone they know). in the case of abuse - which is to what you have been speaking to - the laws of this country protect the rights of the perpatrators/the accused who are most often men.
"What I am reading is concentrated and if the reference to 'people' in this blog is refering to 'man' why not say 'man'. Include this battered 'man' and he will include you ps,. which he already does."
When I used the word "people", I was referring to not only men, but human beings in general... I thought that was clear since I mentioned the global community and that women's issues are inevitably everybody's issues.
"Please stop your self indulgence and keep an open mind."
I get the feeling that you are feeling personally attacked, even though I have no idea who you are... I also get the feeling that it might be a good idea for you to sit yourself down and take a look around, become aware of your own surroundings and the words you yourself expressed in this comment section of this particular entry of my blog... I feel like perhaps you should take this bit of advice and apply it to yourself? the opinions and "facts" you've shared here seem themselves quite tunneled... though I do appreciate your viewpoint (for what it's worth) since you inspired me to go back, re-read what I had written and I noticed a couple things:
1. that you took one paragraph my entire entry and took it completely out of context as an attack on YOU
2. that you should perhaps update your knowledge of canadian and american laws
3. that you perhaps overlooked the fact that the section which you removed from context was about violence in LESBIAN relationships so of course I didn't mention abuse against men...
anyway, I am curious about everyone's opinion in response to my entries... they spark comversation and I love that! though I disagreed with a lot of what this anonymous individual expressed, I hope to hear what more folks have to say on this topic? I hope to hear back from Anonymous as well... everything here is open for discussion! play on!
I would have loved to have been at that conference! Sharing ideas with people who are open minded is such an amazing experience – but you have to enter it with an open mind and an open heart! I think the person who signed their comment “keepanopenmind” missed the point. I think Ornery Hipster got it right when she said that he/she took it as a personal attack. I think KeepAnOpenMind read in the blog what they wanted or expected to read and not what was actually written.
I thought the blog was very open minded and positive. In fact I think I’m going to go read about FAFIA…
C
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